


binary

by julamei



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: lucy is bae, nalu besties, nalu friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-26
Updated: 2015-02-26
Packaged: 2018-08-15 18:39:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8068414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/julamei/pseuds/julamei
Summary: Natsu and Lucy are like a binary star: a star system consisting of two. Their gravity pulls the other back into alignment, so as Natsu spins out of control (the deep emotional toll from the events of the Grand Magic Tournament) Lucy comforts and sets his world aright.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So this is Natsu's emotional fallout after the Grand Magic Tournament, because of course I had to explore that.

"Hello, Happy!" Lisanna called from beside Elfman and Erza.

"Hey Lisanna," Happy replied distractedly. He flew swiftly toward the table that sat the rest of Team Natsu plus Levy, and skidded to a stop next to Lucy. Before she could greet him, Happy whispered something in her ear. He pulled back, flicking his tail agitatedly from side to side as Lucy just stared at him. There was the space of a heartbeat, and then she gave hasty goodbyes to her friends and followed Happy back out the guild doors.

"Wonder what that was all about…" Erza heard from Lisanna. Erza said nothing, only narrowed her eyes at the doors, quickly calculating that Natsu was nowhere to be found.

* * *

Before the door could shut behind her – before she could say anything to the boy sitting cross-legged in the middle of his living room floor – Natsu breathed her name.

"Natsu?" Lucy replied, timidly walking up behind him. His house boasted no organzation nor hygiene, only careless (filthy) teenage boys and their mess. "Happy came to get me… Is everything all right?"

She watched him clench his fists and hang his head. "Lucy…" he whispered again, his chin dipping to his chest. His shoulder lifted and fell in a quick rhythm that struck her like a wave of Aquarius' water – Natsu was crying. Crying!

Her legs instantly closed the distance between them and skid to her knees, her arms enclosing his shaking body from behind. "Natsu…" her voice came out plaintively. What should she do? Natsu was the last person she'd expect to be like this! And she knew he'd be ashamed for her to see him like this…

He touched her arms where they wrapped around his chest. Suddenly, they dug in painfully, and Lucy tried her best not to let slip a whimper. "Happy!" Natsu growled, banging his fist on the floor and swinging his head to stare at the cat.

Happy flew up into a corner of the ceiling. "Hey! Don't blame me! You aren't yourself right now!"

"Natsu, calm down," Lucy chided. "Happy did the right thing," keeping the added  _for once_  silent. "Don't be mad at him." She felt him heave a great sigh, as if to expel his misplaced anger, before he turned in her arms to face her. She blushed at the proximity and how intimately they held each other. He held her gaze for a long moment, and she wondered what on earthland he was looking for. She didn't want to say anything (he was so emotional right now, who knew how he'd react?) and she didn't want to be the one to break the moment. His eyes were bloodshot from his earlier tears, and they were large and open in a vulnerable way that made him seem so much like a young boy; his dark as night eyes most often vacillated between ferocity and joy. Witnessing such an expression of hurt and helplessness on his face tore at Lucy's heart.

Her already battered heart (and severely confused head) took another blow as Natsu's eyes watered once more. She gasped and he hid his face in her neck. Lucy blinked several times as she adjusted to the feel of Natsu's hair, his nose, and his breath against the very sensitive skin of her neck and collar. The moment grew longer, and neither of them moved except Natsu, who only hugged her tighter to him. She looked up and caught sight of Happy, who was peeking out from behind one the tree limbs. He squeaked when he met her eyes and hid himself completely.  _Oh well, I guess I'll be getting no help then_ , she thought.

She steeled herself to do her best to navigate the murky waters of Natsu's emotional turmoil. When she felt cool liquid hit her shoulder, she looked down at him awkwardly.  _I have to take this seriously._  She squeezed him lightly to get his attention. He merely grumbled in response.

"Lucy, you died," he started hoarsely, and her insides froze at his words. "You died, and it was quick and… and easy." She saw the moment flash through her mind, and it was quick and easy. Alarmingly so.

"You died, and I couldn't do a damn thing about it. Didn't stop it, couldn't even try. And it could have you been you-Lucy instead of future-Lucy. You saved you. I was useless." He took a deep breath, and she felt him press warm lips against her throat. Her heart jumped at the contact, but she promptly disillusioned herself of any romantic notions – Natsu was upset and scared, and this was how he was showing his emotion. Gods knew he didn't know what to do with them besides fueling fights.

Keeping her arms loosely around him, Lucy held still; she didn't want him to worry about crossing boundaries. He was in pain and she would do whatever she could to alleviate his grief. "I know, it was terrifying." She agreed and closed her eyes. "Watching myself die was probably the scariest thing that's ever happened to me. I don't even know how to feel about it."

Natsu tightened his arms around her and kissed across her thoat to the other side of her neck, burying his face in her skin and hair. He breathed deeply and hummed. Lucy's skin was on fire where he touched, and they were so close her legs were wrapped around his hips. If it were any other time mortification would have killed her, burned up her completely, but the moment was platonic. Expressing comfort physically wasn't something they did often (never giving much attention to those darker feelings), but there was a precedent for it. Of course, never  _this_  physically, but how else do you deal with the other person's sort-of-death?

"There was a future where I died, and everyone died, and you were all alone," he whispered. "You were all alone but you still managed to go back in time and save us all. Save yourself. You were so lonely you didn't even care that you were dying – you were so lonely you were happy just to see us all again." Lucy felt tears gather and sting at the edges of her own eyes. She remembered future-her asking to see her guild mark as she died. She never let herself think about those moments because it was too much; what Natsu said was true – she didn't want to imagine a world where everyone she loved was dead and she was left alive. She hiccuped with quiet sobs.

"I left you all alone in that future, and who knows what happened in the other one… Rogue's one. The only thing we know is that you saved us  _again_." He swiped his nose across her neck and pulled back to look at her. She felt his arms blazing their outlines on her back as he kept her close. "No matter what future, you always save us. And I had to watch you die."

Lucy lifted a hand to cup his face. Smiling through her own tears, she said, "I'm right here, Natsu. I'm right here, and we changed other-Lucy's future so she's not dead and you're not dead, and we're still going on adventures. Everything turned out alright." She gave a pitiful laugh-hiccup, "It was a team effort!"

His gaze was open again, eyes resolute as they locked on her, and he nodded. "You closing the gates and me smashing them."

He turned away for a moment as they continued to hold each other, then something he noticed set him to his feet and stomping around.

"I just… Watching you die wasn't anything like losing Igneel. Or Lisanna!" He yelled. Lucy stayed seated on the floor. "Look!" He continued, pointing to a mission request pinned to his wall. "This was our first mission! There's your maid outift, and this nail is from the railroad where we stopped Erigor the Shinigami…

"That's a necklace from Garuna Island, and there's a potted plant from that idiot's garden, and the creepy voodoo doll from that 7-kin purgatory guy." He turned to glare at her. "You are everywhere here, and you died! I only have a couple things of Igneel's, nothing of Lisanna's… but you, Lucy, there's tons of stuff here about you," he finished quietly, defeatedly.

Lucy stood and walked over to him. "What do I do if it happens again? If it happens for real?"  _Look around this house_ , she heard in the silence.  _How could I step foot into a house of memories of you?_ She stopped in front of him. Putting her hands on his shoulders, she leaned up slowly and pressed her lips firmly against his check. Before she pulled back completely, she hugged him again.

"We take care of each other, Natsu. We're nakama, and we stay and we fight together. You have to trust me to do everything I can to stay alive so we can live and go on adventures together, just like I trust you to do the same."

Natsu pulled away from the embrace. Looking into her eyes, he nodded. "I can't promise you what the future has in store for us." Lucy steered him over to his couch and cleared away some dirt/clothes/general debris. "But I can promise we'll fight side by side, and we'll get beat up, and we'll have fun and we'll lose and win and I'll complain about rent money…" She grinned up at him. "And we'll never stop having adventures."

Then she guided him to sit down. "I'll make us some dinner."

* * *

Except Natsu didn't stay seated and instead flitted around her in the kitchen, never more than a step behind or beside her. Happy had come out from his hiding place and flew around her hands as she handled fish.  _Is all they ever have fish? I worry about their mercury levels… No vegetables, again,_ she lamented. Soon enough, there were bowls of noodles and fish for each of them (an extra large one for Natsu).

Natsu followed her as sat down on one of his couches and he stood awkwardly for a moment. She raised an eyebrow at him from over her food. He hesitated a moment longer before sitting gingerly on the other couch. Happy settled next to Lucy.

"Ew, Lucy, you know I don't eat this stringy stuff," he complained.

"Oh, you mean  _noodles_ You do know ramen is a staple food?" She replied snarkily. Happy stuck his tongue out at it and made to dump his share of the noodles and soup into her bowl, but she was quick to interject. "No, go give it to Natsu! I can't eat all that!"

A moment later Natsu slammed his (and Happy's) bowl down on the coffee table. "Yum-my! Thank you, Lucy. It was really good tonight." Lucy stared at him. "Could you even taste it?"

"You're the slow eater, Luce, not me!" He smiled. The sight of that sunny grin made her chest ache, however, because she knew he was straining to act normal.  _He still doesn't feel better…_ She frowned.

Natsu stood up and stepped up to her, grabbing her wrist. "Come on, let's do the dishes."

"Natsu! No, I'm not done eating yet! I just said that." He laughed. "Too bad!"

"Aye, too bad, Lucy! We're both done." She gaped at the cat.  _Seriously?_

"Fine!" She yelled, glowering, then shoveled what noodles and fish were left into her mouth. The boys cackled at her puffed cheeks and pulled her to the kitchen, mouth still full.

* * *

They cleaned the dishes quickly, though Lucy whined the whole time. Once finished, she gazed around their house.

"Well, may as well continue, right?" She asked (mostly to herself). Natsu and Happy looked at each other and shrugged. Lucy went about picking up random pieces of clothing, strewn furnitue, and even a creepy Erza punching bag off the floor.

"Really, Natsu?" she asked, waving one of the stick-arms at him. "Natsu, you better stop fighting with Gray and be the pals, or I'm gonna beat the crap out of you!" She impersonated in a voice much too low for Erza. Natsu blushed. "What? I haven't beaten her yet!"

"You're impossible," Lucy spoke as she tossed it in a corner against a bookshelf. Before she could turn around, she felt Natsu's arms snake around her waist. "Wah-?"

She found herself on the floor, between Natsu's legs as he sat with his back up against one of his couches. He buried his face in the back of her neck.

"Geez Natsu," she griped, struggling a bit but only for show.

"He liiiikes you," Happy sang. Natsu managed to ignore the cat, but Lucy could not. She flushed red and flailed her arms at him. "You come say that to my face, I'll beat the crap – I'll beat you worse than Erza!" She threatened, then watched in satisfaction as Happy harrumphed and flew out the window. "Whatever, you guys are boring anyway."

Once alone, she patted Natsu's hands. "You okay?" She murmured. He sighed into her hair. "I think so," he replied, before resting his cheek against the top of her head. The warmth of his body behind and around her was soothing, and she felt at peace.

"It's true though," he began. "I always felt special that Igneel chose me to raise. He wasn't even my species, but he loved me enough to take me in, care for me, and teach me magic. When he left… I was crushed. I'd never been alone before, and it was weird when I had to be around other people other than to get food or books from them. I know Igneel's still out there, and I'm gonna find him, but I know he's not dead."  _Not like you were dead_ , hung heavy, unspoken, betweeen them. "And with Lisanna… we were good friends, but she belonged to Mira and Elfman. We spent a lot of time together, but we were only friends. Losing her sucked, and I thought it was the worst thing to happen since Igneel left…" He paused. "But you," he squeezed her. The thick bands of his arms underneath her hands reassured her, and she absently traced the cords of his muscles.

"I had to watch you die. We're the only family the other has, and I watched you die. We chose each other and we're nakama… and I let you down."

Lucy pulled back to look him in the eyes. Emotion swirled within her and she felt her eyes burn with the risk of more tears. She wanted to interrupt and correct him, but she knew he needed to say whatever he was going to say.

"I'll never let that happen again," he promised her in a low voice that sunk beneath her skin and plated her bones in armor. Gods but she trusted and loved this boy. His determination and sincerity never ceased to amaze her. She nodded. "I can't lose you again and I won't," Natsu continued. Lucy wrapped her arms around him, craddling his head against her neck. "You won't, Natsu," she spoke. "I'll always be right here."

* * *

"So Natsu, I had an idea…" Lucy said the next morning from her position on the couch. They had fallen asleep soon after their talk, and Lucy crashed on the couch, using his traveling blanket as covers.

Happy flew down from his small hammock. "Oh boy…" He began. "Lucy has the dumbest ideas!"

"I do not, Happy! You jerk!" She yelled, throwing a rock (what kind of people have rocks in their house?) at the offending cat.

"Yeah, they are kinda lame, Luce. Sorry," Natsu added, rolling out of his hammock and gracefully standing to stretch.

Lucy sighed. "Natsu, I promise you'll like – well, it's a good idea." She went over to his kitchenette and started fixing tea. Wth the kettle bowling, she turned around, her arms still bracing against the counter. "I think we should make a grave for future-Lucy."

Natsu's hand halted at the base of his head. She smiled at him. "A grave?"

"But she's not even dead!" Happy argued.

Lucy shrugged. "I think it'd be good for us." The kettle whistled and she poured out three cups of tea. Handing his cup to him with one hand, she laid the other over his as he grasped the mug. "Please, Natsu? I don't want to forget her, and what she did for us. But I need some closure. I think we could use this, then put all of it behind us."

Lucy looked up at her pink-haired friend. She enjoyed how their eyes were nearly level and naturally sought each others, and how his broad shoulders seemed to envelop her. Everything about Natsu made her feel safe. His eyes were open, like they were last night, but held curiosity instead of pain.

"…What?" she asked. He smiled a huge, Natsu grin. She beamed back at him before he snatched her up in a hug.

* * *

Lucy watched sweat trickle down Natsu's temples and chest. For such an immature weirdo, he could be quite a hunk.

"Is that far enough?" He asked her, wiping his bangs out of his eyes.

She pointed to the shallow pit they'd dug at the edge of the cemetery. "Almost!"

He smiled and lifted the boulder back onto his shoulder. "Heeve-ho, Natsu!" Happy encouraged.

After he'd set it down in their designated spot, Lucy took a deep breath and held up the pen she'd borrowed from Levy. Repeating and tracing out the words Levy taught her, script appeared on the surface of the rock. It read, "LUCY X791" and the epitaph, "To protect a brighter future," underneath with the mark of Fairy Tail.

Smelling of woodsmoke and sweat, Natsu stood next her while Happy gave voice to the words. Lucy could feel the hot rush of tears as she thought about future-Lucy dying in her arms. She wrapped an arm around Natsu's waist to ward off the fear and sadness, and he slung one of his over her shoulder. Tail swishing side to side and wings outstretched, Happy perched on Natsu's arm, just next to Lucy's head.

"Now we can come here when we're scared or worn out or feel like giving up. She died for our future, and we owe it to her and everyone we love to never give up on the future we believe in," she spoke quietly.

Tilting her head back, Lucy met Natsu's gaze and smiled despite her watery eyes. She felt him hug her closer and lean his head to rest against hers. Happy jumped down into Lucy's welcoming arms.

"For all the adventures we still have, and all the adventures she's going on in her new future," he intoned. She nodded.

"Aye sir."

**Author's Note:**

> All I want to do is write all the behind-the-scenes action from the Grand Magic Games Arc. It's on par with Fullmetal Alchemist and the first arc of Bleach for my favorite manga storyline. Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
